Ordering Food in Russia

When ordering food in a Japanese restaurant, one has several options:

A) Ask for and receive a menu written in English.
B) Ask for a waitperson who understands English. There's usually at least one who does.
B) Even if the menu is only in Japanese, point to one of the many pictures displaying specific menu items.
C) Point to the ubiquitous plastic food models in the display window of the restaurant.
D) Fake it by adding a "u" sound to the end of the food's English name. E.g., "steak-u".
E) Bring along a native Japanese speaker, or your son who can read katakana.

In Russia, at least in a relatively remote city like Vladivostok, most restaurant personnel do not speak English, the menus don't have pictures, there are no plastic food models to be found, and adding a suffix to the English word just engenders puzzled looks from the waitperson.


One can usually get traditional Russian fare, such as borsh or vodka, because the Americanized Russian is still understandable. But try getting a steak or salad. Did I already mention puzzled looks?


Nevertheless, being clever world travelling sailors, we discovered the following cheat sheet on the internet. This got us through several meals:

But there were some notable challenges. Pointing to the various generic food items on this chart usually resulted in follow-on questions, the substance of which was ambiguous to us, resulting in equally obscure answers. For instance, did he just say "fried chicken" or grilled chicken with "fries"? Did he ask how I want my beef cooked? Did he understand when I said, "medium"? Were we even having the same conversation? Eventually you just say "da" and wait to see what shows up from the kitchen.


Not surprising then, when the steak I thought I ordered turned out to be:

Grilled pork chop. Very tasty. Not steak.







Fortunately, ordering dessert was easier. Most waiters understood "ice cream," for which Russia is rightly famous. In one particular establishment it came with a choice of syrup, fruit, or chocolate. One could even combine toppings, hence the really delicious vanilla ice cream with fresh strawberries and "fruit syrup" depicted below. One devoted ice cream-o-phile among us had to have two....twice.

Most easily understood, thank goodness, was the intent when ordering "cappuccino" or "whisky." The photo below shows a particularly pleasing combination of creme brulee (prounounced "creme brulee" in Russian), along with cappuccino and Jamesons (the latter obtained by pointing at the bottle over the bar).

A truly motivated foodie can eat very well in Russia. It just takes an open mind and a little patience. Also, if you patronize the same establishment for several consecutive evenings you eventually win favored customer status and get to sample bonus delicacies that you would never have known how to order.

Yummm.